- the speaker always has a personal connection to the issue
- the speaker uses concrete examples from their life or examples that they have witnessed to illustrate the point
This presents a bit of a problem: Our teacher wants us to talk about an issue that is meaningful to us, but I don't have a personal connection to many of the issues except the following:
- Affirmative Action (I think anyone applying to college is connected to this)
- Religion, Spirituality, and Science
- Immigration (by virtue of my relatives)
- Gay Rights
I'm not allowed to do Affirmative Action because I am already presenting that to the class. Religion and Spirituality doesn't really interest me, Immigration is a bit blah, and gay rights would force me to come out.
This project is due sometime in November, and our recording will be played in front of both AP English classes. Assuming I am out to my parents and closest friends by then, I think it would actually be an effective way of coming out. I wouldn't have to go around and tell people because the recording would tell them all at once. Also, my school is so small that if one English class found out, I think everyone else would know within about 20 minutes.
I'm toying with this idea right now, so I'd like to hear your thoughts.
P.S. I still haven't come out to my parents. As usual, they are both on business trips. Hopefully I will get an opportunity to come out tomorrow or Friday night.
12 comments:
I don't believe there is a specific time or place to come out. Everyone's story is unique and their experience their own. My coming out was very random and not planned. All I can say is think it over and do what feels right. I do think that the project would allow you to open peers up to an issue(s) that are very close to you and give them a friend to put on an issue. I don't know if any of that made sense. Best wishes, Brandon
Jason,
First I applaud you for your determination and brave stance in matters of coming out. In hindsight I knew (relatively) many guys who were gay but came out only in their college or post-college years. None of these guys came out publicly in HS (at least not that I know of), let alone in front of either section of AP English.
I think your decision to come out through your assignment all depends on how badly you want to come out, to how many people, and how comfortable you are with everyone knowing. If you feel that's where your heart is, do it with all your heart. If not, you could play it safe and go with another topic. No one here would think any less of you, and we're behind you either way. You just have to promise us you'll tell us how it all plays out. :)
I disapprove affirmative actiom. It´s just a fine word for nada! Propz Pilgrim
@pilgrim: affirmative action gave us Clarance Thomas who votes against it every time he can (ironic), Barack Obama,etc.
When implemented with some degree of unbiased common sense it can work well and fairly. Affirmative action allows colleges and universities, especially, to foster a learning community that promotes understanding and acceptance and more accurately reflects the real world population. It also allows the fortunate to rub elbows with the less fortunate and thereby, we hope, develop both a better understanding and appreciation of diversity. It's far from perfect, and some individuals might be "left out". But a 90% affluent white male aristocracy is also imperfect and leaves people out.
Suppose the top 10% of all "traditionally" truly qualified applicants formed a "pool" from which individuals were then randomly admitted so that a truly diverse frosh class was formed? If a student is in the top 10% academically, maybe a selection process that randomly produces a diverse class of 2013 is not a bad thing. It is social engineering, yes, but so was W's Yale and military history.
It is difficult to eliminate class and privilege. But perhaps efforts to create a _more_ level playing field are not always all bad.
I like the idea of discussing gay rights. Who says that you have to come out as part of your assignment? The Equality March was just last weekend and several states are in the middle of discussions/debates on gay marriage or civil unions. There is a ton of discussion happening on the news almost everyday about gay rights.
As far as a personal connection goes:
- Perhaps you have friends who are gay or you suspect are gay.
- Perhaps you have family members that are gay.
- Again, it does not have to be the fact that you are gay.
- Because of your connection with someone else who is gay, you believe they should have the same rights as heterosexual people.
Playing devil's advocate here, discussing gay rights will spur discussion, questions, and possibly rumors that you might be gay. Perhaps it can be a catalyst to you being able to come out later when you are ready.
On a personal note, in my senior year of high school we had to do a research project and presentation on some topic relevant in today's society. I chose the tragedy of pediatric AIDS in the US and in third world countries. (I wanted to be a pediatrician when I was younger, so it hit home for me.)
At that point in time, AIDS was usually focussed on the gay population. However, I don't remember anyone discussing or questioning why I was choosing that topic...would they have guessed that I was gay??? I don't know.
I realize that my topic may have some similarities, but yours is much more directed towards a specific group of people.
Whatever you decide, we will be here to help you and be a sounding board for ideas and support.
Keep us posted on what you decide and if we can help!
- JC
PS...Good luck coming out to your parents. I am sending positive thoughts your way that they will handle it with the same unconditional love and acceptance they have always shown you.
If that is what you want then I say go for it as a way to come out to people.
But make sure this is what you really want to do b/c you can't undo coming out to people
What would be more appropriate than gay rights? The struggle you're facing coming out provides the context. One of the best expostulations I've seen about what sexual preference discrimination does to the lives of gay persons was written last week by Dave of dazegonebi.blogspot.com, in commemoration of Matt Shepard's death. Everyone should read it. You, Jason, are the product of a loving environment, but as you well know there are a lot of young people born to intolerant religious fundamentalists who have absolutely no sympathy except what they get on the Web. The whole dimensions of this problem are things that you are peculiarly well situated to address.
You are in a unique position to do this and I think that you half knew that when you argued in your post that you should present on the issue of gay rights.
Given that you WILL have come out to your parents by that time, and only providing that you have, then I think it is a (dare I say?) god given opportunity for you.
Once you succeed in writing and presenting this then telling anyone and everyone else who needs to know, or you wish to know, will be so very much easier and become a life habit - which is what it needs to be, of course.
There is utterly no reason why you should not take all the discussion and arguments first - other guys have suggested you could talk about hate crime (cyber bullying?)with reference to Matthew Shephard; you have two speeches now by your President; gay history month and, of course, the March and Rally for Equality at the weekend.
There's loads to put together into a really strong history lesson plus a current affairs report on change.
Then, if you wanted to, at the end, you could simply say - 'and why do I know so much about all this? Because I'm gay of course. These are things which affect my life and my future etc..'
OK? I hope so!
If I can help - my email's on my Profile.
It would be a great thing to do. It would have a real impact on all those who heard it: because it would be your coming out, but also because you are an intelligent, articulate person speaking of something important to you.
It would take courage, but would be memorable for you and your class.
J, using this opportunity to "come out" would be a bold move on your part, but not knowing the political atmosphere in your school prevents me from advising it. It would be big news at your school, that I am sure.
I find the concept of "Affirmative Action" fundamentally unfair. Solving discrimination by further discrimination doesn't really help anyone - it is a disincentive for excellence.
Thanks for the advice, everyone. You guys are so helpful and inspiring.
I will consider going with Micky's advice. I recently learned that this will be due on November 2, which means I have very little time to tell all the important people before then.
Of course, I don't think we will be listening to the projects until a while later.
Also, going with Micky's advice will allow me to change things last minute. It's just a matter of adding another sentence to the end.
Also, if I choose to do gay rights, I will probably talk about the hate crimes legislation or Obama's record on gay rights.
I think coming out in front of the class is pretty risky.
This is totally irrelevant to your classroom project in a way, but I have to say that coming out should be done on a personal level.
Many of my friends who are gay did come out to a small group of friends first, who then told their trustworthy friends. By simply telling everybody all at once, you're opening yourself to judgments from your peers.
Say, if you came out to your best friend (through e-mail, IRL, phone, anything... [I personally think e-mail is the easiest. Although it IS rather impersonal, it's the best way to get your thoughts all organized/revised before sending it. Whatever plans you make will NEVER happen the way you want it to happen in real life]) and you entrusted your friend to tell others, your friend can protect you. When that friend tells his/her friends, s/he can say it in a supportive way, and somewhat enforce that "oh, it's not a biggie" sentiment on that person.
People's thoughts and feelings can definitely be influenced easily in my opinion, if there is that personal intimacy/connection. Mass-coming out is too impersonal in my opinion.
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