Allow me to further explain how things are going at home:
My father is a higher up at a multi-billion dollar firm. He told me that he is on some committee that works to promote equality for LGBT employees, but from this spot, he has also seen that discrimination still exists. I'm not sure how involved my dad is with this committee because he's on tons of committees, but I suspect that he'll start to take a new interest in it now that he has a gay son.
Of course, this may just be the lens that he has. The firm he works at his insane internal politics, and people will use any means necessary to get you fired so they can take your job. In this sort of environment, homosexuality can indeed be a hamper on your career. Of course, most workplaces are not like this at all.
As for my little brother. He is 9, but is very mature. He's got a better vocabulary than I do, and I suppose his maturity is a product of having two older brothers. More importantly, he goes to the same school as I do (k-12), so telling him was a necessity. If we did not, he would have found out from a classmate, and that would have been bad.
I was not there when my parents told him, but my dad succinctly described his reaction: “He frowned and ran away.” My parents pointed out that kids at school make fun of gay people, so he's probably worried for me. Either that or he's embarrassed for himself. We're not really sure. I should talk to him about it, but he tends to run away whenever you talk about something he doesn't want to discuss. Perhaps I will approach the subject while I drive him home.
The good news is that I'm his favorite brother, so he's not about to reject me overnight.
9 comments:
I'm sure that your little brother will take it well. He may be a bit younger, but he's still your brother.
Love,
Boyd
I suppose if you gave your brother some information on coping with being teased about it, maybe it will help. If he knows how to respond to someone's comments, it will help him.
"People are going to say things about me being gay, and they may call me or you names. Just tell them _____"
Filling in the blank is the hard part...
If he has never heard anything positive about gay people, only negative, your little brother's reaction is natural enough. I think if you can get him to express his thoughts and feelings (IOW don't tell him what he needs to understand, ask him what he thinks, knows, feels), you should be able to help him deal with it.
I hope it goes well.
Your dad's being on the committee is a plus. Too bad what he's seen in the workplace isn't so positive. But I think he's on your side, however clumsily.
Jason
I hope your brother can understand with time and information, after all he is still very young.
Once again i think your parents should be commended for the way they have approached and handled this with you
I wish you continued luck and hope to chat soon
take care and be safe
bob
High pressures your dad's probably under. It kind of sounds like any major firm to me - the higher up you go, the more of that kind of internal politics you see. Maybe that's just my own jaded opinion.
As for your little brother, do try to find a way to talk to him. Being the favorite brother certainly helps. :-P He'll come around, I'm sure.
I guess your little brother has heard a lot of negative stereotypes about gays. It is confusing for him to hear that his favorite brother is gay.
He needs to experience that you are still the same person and he needs to experience that your behavior towards him and other persons has not changed.
RR
reject you overnight? how about never?
Don't worry! He will understand.
I suspect your father's real role on the committee is to keep the GLBT community off the company's back. He's too smart and experienced to give his internal rivals any ammunition, and especially put them in the position of attacking him through his family. This situation will not be a factor in your life, nor is it your problem.
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